Chapter 15

An Owner's Manual for Raising Children

Transformation

Before you read

Kevin poses these at the start of the chapter, deliberately before his own argument. Answer them first if you can.

1
What childhood experiences do you think helped you develop a sense of self and personal power?
2
What childhood experiences might have detracted from developing a sense of self and personal power?
3
How can the power-responsibility dynamic help someone navigate childhood and early adulthood?

Kevin’s own distillation, in his words — not a summary written for him.

The power-responsibility dynamic and its underlying principles can be applied to nearly all parental situations while providing positive examples for the children.
When we strive to live our values 24/7, our children notice and are much more likely to adopt and live similar values.
Regardless of the complexity of the family situation, relationships with children must remain open, honest, and trustworthy.
If our parenting decisions are based on our values, they won’t be wrong.
Rather than “protect” children from risks, we need to provide opportunities for supervised, reasonable risks which drive a sense of personal power and responsibility.
If children are put in charge of their own learning, growth, and development (with adult guidance and mentoring), they will take responsibility for all three.

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